The concepts like ‘the ultimate aim of human life is to realize that God and we are one(salvation)’ made me think that my current actions are wrong fearing that they are delusions.Earlier i was very devoted to God and used to sing Bhajans and vedas.I was also doing well in my studies.But now I am very unhappy and confused.I could not concentrate on my studies.I found my life very dull and boring.Everyday i wake up with some unknown fear.It is said that human life is rare in the cycle of rebirths and it is only through h uman life that we can achieve the so called salvation.After hearing this i feel like i will be born again on this form in some other life forms like animals or insects.I feel very ashamed to tell someone nonsense like this.But i am suffering a lot because of such fears.Īt many times i forget that i am living and imagining that i am living in a world of delusions.Some times i went to bed crying.I feel so lonely.All my classmates are doing well where i am not able to concentrate well.One day i mind goes blank and couldn’t concentrate on anything.My life is becoming miserable now.I am not able to study well after this problem.I became very lazy also.Most of the time i am unhappy and i start spending a lot of time sleeping because it helped me to get rid of my problems with mind.With my constant anxiety my body feels weak and started having stomach problems like indigestion and acidity.I also feels to hate God.But still i pray to God to get rid of this problem but i cannot fully devout to my prayers.I have a habit of talking to myself.Sometimes i hate myself for my nature.My classmates are all cheerful. I am a student.I think i am very introverted and i don’t have much friends in my class.My problem is that i think a lot.Most of the time i am absent minded.I live in a spiritual family and my father used to watch a lot of spiritual videos and read spiritual books.I also got interested in this matter and i also started reading them expecting that it would make my life more happier.Many of the concepts told in those books like “maya or delusion” ,re-birth,ceiling on desires etc confused me.I started contemplating on it and got confused.Then i read many books on this topic and i got confused again and again.